Face-to-Face Time

When it comes to marriage there are many marvelous and great experiences that you will have with your spouse. There are some things that will help strengthen your relationship and there are things that can harm your relationship. One thing that helps maintain the trust you have with your spouse and leads to a happier marriage is complete fidelity to your spouse. Always be on guard to make sure you do not stray from this. Constantly work to strengthen the unity and love that exists between the two of you. 

            One thing that is hard for many people in today’s world – both old and young -- and a place where issues can arise is on social media. Social media when not used in proper ways can be damaging to the marriage relationship or any relationship for that matter. Several of these ways are: one, that social media does not show real life. Two, that social media is designed to make you feel like you need to be there. Third, and lastly, your social media “friends” are not your close friends.

            First, social media does not show real life. Log on to Facebook, Instagram, or any other social network and you will find that everyone on there has something either extremely glamorous and happy to share or they are having the worst day of their life. The in-between comes few and far between those posts. Social media is more like a competition. People want to see who can get the most likes or comments on a post because society makes most people feel as though that is what is the most important in life. 

            Second, social media is designed to make you feel like you have to be there. The more time you spend on social media sites the more you feel like you need to check them when you are not on them. Last week I attempted to go without social media for a week. I deleted the apps from my phone and would not look at it. For the first few days it was hard! I would unlock my phone, go to click on it, realize it was not there, and shut my phone off again. It was awesome. I started to read rather than sit and scroll. I found that when I was spending time with my wife I was there physically as well as mentally. I was not distracted and I could give her the attention she deserves. 

            Third, and lastly, your social media “friends” are not your close friends. Social media, although we feel like it brings us together can often times widen the gap that exists between us and others. We see what is going on in the lives of our friends and do not think to call or meet up in person to ask how they are doing. How many of the friends that you have on social media are your close friends? Interesting to think that we sit and scroll through the lives of those we are not close to acting like we care what is going on in their lives. 

            Not all social media is bad. There are some benefits that come from social media and there are many proactive things we can do with it that can help and improve the communication we have with others and can help us contact people we would otherwise be unable to talk to. I notice my wife, Rae, stays in contact with many people she met in Mexico while she lived there. I think that is awesome! With all the good that also can come with social media I do think it is a good idea to step back, unplug, and improve the personal face-to-face interactions we have with those around us. It will better those relationships as well as our marriages. What are some things you do to unplug from social media? How have you found that unplugging from social media has improved your face-to-face relationships?